This week, I met with a best friend of yesterday years and we have not met in nearly 15 years. We had so much to talk about and it was nostalgic going back through memory lane. To be real with you; its not easy being a man in the 21st century. Who can you turn to? Who can really understand the chamber of your heart? Who will make the time to listen to you, empathize with you, comfort you and reassure you?
At times I believe that women are better coping with their emotional side…. Sure you see them striking conversation, much of it could be gossip but at the end of the day it is therapeutic for them and you find that many women outlive their spouses. The man is too worried taking care of the bills, competing with men and women for resources to pay more bills and forgetting to take care of himself by taking a break. Even if he meets with his ‘boys’, over a drink or a game- real issues pertaining to resolving the challenges of life might not be discussed. Pressure, worry and confusion cloud often clouds the mind.
As we spoke and brought each other to speed on our life’s travels- we kept recalling the bitter pills that we had to swallow along and in the process it really brought some relief and peace of mind getting it out of our hearts. If we really knew at the tender age of sweet sixteen- what the future would be like; we would have enjoyed our youth more, smiled more, been a little more kinder and obedient to our parents and even leaders. It is only years later- when life has taken on a different turn than expected when you truly appreciate the past, live in the present and look forward to the future! I am really grateful for such experiences in life where you become mature, responsible and wiser. Life maybe filled with more mountains and bridges to climb as you get older but it is part of the refiners fire for cementing one’s true character.
My prayer and hope for all men is to embrace dialogue with other men, to open up, speak the silent truth however much it may hurt or weaken your ego. We keep so much ‘crap’, hidden inside the chamber of our souls that it eventually kills us softly. We were designed differently than women and it not very natural or easy for us to open up; rather we lie to ourselves that we ought to man up and stop being a weakling because men are suppose to be strong. My question is therefore, for how long can men be strong? Let’s be different than our fathers, lets choose dialogue, live and let live and sometimes swallow that pride like a bitter pill so that your soul can do the healing.